Patty regularly overextended herself past her physical boundaries. She said this with a light somewhat rebellious smile and added that she ignored the advice of others who told her that she should do less. In our discussion I pointed out to her that there was a part that ignored the needs of her body and a physical part that set the boundaries the first part ignored. She was puzzled by this interpretation, and she became curious.
When I asked her what made her transgress her own boundaries, she said: "I’ll show them!". "Show what?" "That I can do it." The fact that she must prove to other people that she could do it led me to the conclusion that there was another part, which didn’t seem capable. I checked this with her, and she confirmed that, and even more: that that part felt worthless. Now she was visibly moved by this awareness: She hadn’t realised that she was suppressing something.
Asked what made this part feel worthless, her face darkened: It had started when Patty wasn't the youngest child in the family anymore, and Mum's affection had turned towards her younger siblings. When she lost her mother's full attention, she had concluded that she wasn't worth her mother’s focus. Then she had started to prove that she was also there. I asked for a memory, and she told me how she saw herself sitting apart from the rest of the family, while her parents took care of the little children.
When I asked her what made her transgress her own boundaries, she said: "I’ll show them!". "Show what?" "That I can do it." The fact that she must prove to other people that she could do it led me to the conclusion that there was another part, which didn’t seem capable. I checked this with her, and she confirmed that, and even more: that that part felt worthless. Now she was visibly moved by this awareness: She hadn’t realised that she was suppressing something.
Asked what made this part feel worthless, her face darkened: It had started when Patty wasn't the youngest child in the family anymore, and Mum's affection had turned towards her younger siblings. When she lost her mother's full attention, she had concluded that she wasn't worth her mother’s focus. Then she had started to prove that she was also there. I asked for a memory, and she told me how she saw herself sitting apart from the rest of the family, while her parents took care of the little children.